Continuing to make my way through Nancy DeMoss's book, Lies Women Believe....and the Truth That Sets Them Free brings me to Lie # 3. (If you're just joining in and are interested ~ or if you've been following these posts on Wednesdays and missed Lie #2 on Saturday ~ you can find earlier posts on this book by clicking on the tag "Lies Women Believe" at the bottom of this one.)
Lie # 3 : God Is Just Like My Father
Lie #3 is based on the fact that as women, our view of God can be largely influenced by the men we have known in our lives ~ our fathers in particular. Our sense, or feeling, of who God is can be shaped by those men, both positively and negatively.
If your father was harsh & abusive, overbearing, unable to express love, distant or even absent, you may have the tendency to view the Heavenly Father in the same way. If this is the case for you, you might find trusting God difficult. Ms. Demoss puts it well when she says,
I do believe that her take on this relationship is true for many, but this is a lie that has never held any influence over me......and it easily could have. Coming from the perspective of the daughter whose father was absent for much of her growing-up years, I can wholeheartedly attest to the damage it does within. If you happen to be a father who has stumbled upon this post, let me urge you to NEVER, EVER underestimate the way your daughter desperately needs your active involvement and steadfast love in her life. The abundance, or lack of, your involvement will shape who she becomes and will stay with her for the rest of her life. If you are a woman, as I suspect most of those who read my blog are, encourage the father of your children and impress upon them the value they have in their children's lives. Without that relationship, they may be susceptible to this lie.....and the door will be open to many more."You must believe me when I tell you that God is not like any man you have ever known. The wisest, kindest earthly father is but a pale reflection of our heavenly Father. The God of the Bible in infinitely more wonderful and pure and loving than even the most wonderful father. That is why it is so important that we not allow our view of God to be determined by other men, for at their very best they are flawed representations of God."
I don't know why this lie has never influenced me.....all I know is that from the first moment I truly met my Heavenly Father, this is what I found, and have clung to that peace, assurance and love ever since. Statistically, I should not be living the life that I do. I have an abundance of living and breathing examples all around me of what my life could have been without my embracing the love of God. I praise Him and am overwhelmed with thankfulness for my God, my Father, who loves to overcome statistics, hurt, and pain and let his goodness wash over the wounds and scars that we all have caused by an imperfect world. Does He completely eliminate the hurt and pain? Perhaps for some, but for me......a part of me will always be the eight year old Daddy's Girl changed forever by a decision made by others and forced upon her. There will always be fragments of a little broken heart that was torn to pieces by the loss of a relationship that she adored. My Father above is a soothing balm to that broken part of me. He took an angry, hurt and confused teenage girl and gave her what she needed most. He taught a young mother to see that parents aren't perfect and we do the best we can.......and brought forgiveness, understanding and a new beginning to a relationship wrongly severed. He teaches me so many things, day by day, circumstance by circumstance, and hurt by hurt.......and I love and lean on Him ~ not because I am strong, but because I recognize how weak I am and how much I need Him. He loves me. Perfectly. In Him, I am made whole.
"Discomfort and unrest are impossible to souls who come to know that God is their Father........What good earthly father would not do, God who is our Father would not do either; and what a good father ought to do, God who is our Father is absolutely sure to do.Christ has declared to us the name of the Father in order that we may discover that the Father loves us as He loves His Son. If we believed this, could we ever have an anxious or rebellious heart again? Would we not believe in every conceivable circumstance that the devine Father would care for us in the best possible way and meet our every need?"
If you are struggling with hurt and healing caused by the absence of your father, I also recommend this book:
My Mustard Seed Planting verse of the week:
"See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are; For this reason, the world does not know us, because it did not know Him. Beloved, now we are children of God, and it has not appeared as yet what we will be, We know that when He appears, we will be like Him, because we will see Him just as He is. And everyone who has this hope fixed on Him purifies himself, just as He is pure." ~ John 3:1-3