Saturday, August 9, 2014

When Things Don't Go The Way You Planned.....

They finally started chemo at 1:13 am. (Saturday)....my sleeping beauty got up for just a few minutes around 8:00 to brush her teeth, etc.....and was doing ok, got back into bed and had her mama bring her an extra blanket, tuck her in tight with a kiss, and fell back to sleep.  And she sleeps on....

Looking at my calendar at things coming up.....Robert's 13th bday falls right in the middle of her 4th round of chemo.  UGH.  Gonna make the best of it just like Winnie the Pooh says.....but.....

DADGUMMIT.  :'(

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SN: I gained much wisdom and love for Winnie the Pooh from an 18 book set of storybooks that I would read to my kids when they were small enough to sit in my lap.....and even when they weren't.  :)  Each book began with "Words of Wisdom" from Winnie the Pooh, and then a story to follow.  We had storytime every night before bed and they would come to me, with their little chubby selves and their cute little faces and excited little eyes.....and have not ONE, but two or three books each in their chubby little hands and often, I would read every single book they brought until I gave out.  ;)  Many times, there was one....or two or three... from our Winnie the Pooh set.  I read them so much, I memorized them.  They were the BEST books and I still quote them today!! ;)  And I still have them....in storage right now, but I think I will hold onto them forever.  I got rid of so many things over the course of two moves, but those books.....they're special.  <3  Smiling now as I think of silly names I've given to things and recipes, and of how many quotes & phrases I use, that came from those books...

My three would fight like crazy over who got to sit in my lap.  Usually one would get there first and greedily climb up and hold on tight so they didn't lose the most treasured seat in the house.  ;)  The other two would sit on each side of me, as close as they could get and they would often have to turn the pages for me because they were leaning in to me so closely that I couldn't move my arms.  And I would read until my throat hurt, with that one in my lap snuggled up tight....his or her head just under my chin, or right beside my face, depending on which one it was, and I could rest my head against their sweet smelling hair while I read.  Chubby little fingers pointing at their favorite pictures and swatting their siblings' hands out of the way.  Little legs wiggling and kicking with excitement when we got to their favorite part.  Mighty and indignant protests if I tried to skip sentences to shorten the story....they had them memorized, too...couldn't pull one over on them!!  Smiles and laughter when I would try, just to pick on them and hear their reactions when I did.  Ahhhhh.....sweet, sweet memories are even better than that good cup of coffee I posted about earlier, but they trigger tears in your eyes and an ache in your heart (and coffee doesn't do that). 

Do you ever think about your most favorite & treasured times and wish you could just go back....just for a little while....and be in those moments again??  For time to stand still while you just....BE STILL in those moments and wish they would go in super slow motion so that you can soak up every drop of them with all of your senses and find a place within you to hold those moments tight and keep them safe so that you never, ever lose them....and can go back to them anytime you want or need to??  Or is it just me and I'm the only one that's weird like that??  Maybe that's why I hold on to those books and always will..... 

"When things don't go the way you plan.....Make the best of it"!  ~ Winnie the Pooh
 
 
Words of Wisdom from Winnie the Pooh.  A very wise bear indeed.  I like him.  And I like that Tigger, too.  I think if you combined the two, you'd have ME.  ;)
 
 
 

Hospitals.  Lots of quiet.  Apparently good for writing.  And processing, filtering, organizing and working my way through the many thoughts battling each other in my head because of the quiet.

It helps. 

Make the best of it.  Any way you can.

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