The Boy Who Will Become a Man...

I just watched the sunlight fade & finally disappear while snuggled up with my "baby" boy, talking about cats & dogs & rabbits....& hard stuff.  Sigh.  We've been through SO MUCH hard stuff for a while now.  And then, as he continued to chatter nonstop about the way the trees looked against the sky & birds & baseball & the beach & something about his favorite app, I prayed that this boy would grow up to be the kind of man that my heart isn't even sure exists in this world today.

 

I wanted to squeeze those prayers right into him, listing all the traits & character & desire for God that I want him to have, to make them take root so deeply that they would become his. I was glad it was dark and he was preoccupied with his own chatter & that my tears that escaped were absorbed by his thick hair & he didn't notice. 

 

I wish there was a guaranteed method to this madness called Motherhood. I wish that even if the kind of man I'm not sure exists DOESN'T exist, that I knew how to make both of my boys become that kind of man anyway.

I wish, I wish, I wish....and more than that, I pray....