Thursday, October 30, 2014

To Be Continued....

SweetDivaMJ is on vacation from blogging....but can't bring herself to delete her blog.  I've tried to keep updates limping along, copying and pasting from my fb page updates, as that's all the energy I've had to put into it.  I'm more than a little worn out from the events of the past two years in my life and have to focus all of my energy on getting my cancer fighter through the battle...and on to healthy living again.

To Be Continued....

Friday, October 10, 2014

Count Your Blessings, And Distractions....Again

......and my son just comes in the back door.

"Hey, mom....you wanna see my most prized possession"???? I turn around, and there's a dead lizard being dangled only a couple of inches from my face, with something in its mouth.

BB gun = 1. Lizard = 0. 

Mom = AFTER recovering from lizard shock & her heartbeat returns to normal = smiling that there will always be other areas of life that just keep movin' on....that boys will be boys....and that mine love to tease me, and that they just plain LOVE me.

But he better be thanking the good Lord above that his lizard kill didn't actually touch me. And he says he's going to hang him on his wall.

‪#‎ThatAintHappening‬‪#‎CountYourBlessingsNameThemOneByOne‬

Count Your Blessings

The cutest patient in the world slept all night....I think....and is still asleep. Trying to decide which of several medication choices to start her off with today, but don't want to wake her up. If she's sleeping, she's not feeling bad!!

I might try some of her meds myself....I was up partying half the night with vertigo!! And I just have to laugh....cuz what else can you do?? Life. It's a roller coaster ride. And some times it feels like it....literally. Right now, I think I'm riding the tea cup ride at Disney World....

But hey. She didn't have an early morning radiation treatment....which gives me time to get my dizzy under some kind of control before we go. And I've got coffee in my cup with cafe mocha creamer. It's good to the last drop, & there's still more where this came from. And the sunlight's shining in through the kitchen window and hitting my glass cup just right.....my cafe mocha coffee could audition for an advertising spot right now looking all pretty-like.... wink emoticon

‪#‎CountYourBlessingsNameThemOneByOne‬

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Chemo Round 4

So.......chemo round 4 is hanging on tight & doing a number on my patient.....it would be great if she didn't throw up anymore today....and she's very tired & dizzy, too. It would also be great if she could get through the night without waking up to throw up like she did last night. It would kinda help if she could keep her medicine down...that's not happening at the moment.....

‪#‎PrayForAshlyn‬

I HATE THIS.

"My mind's eye remembers the trouble I've seen
All I have been through, and how I long to be free
But I learn by her patience that I need her resolve
To wait for the opening of eternity's halls
And I know that in time we will stand side by side
When Jesus comes back receiving His bride
Where there will be no more pain
No more sorrow
No more waiting
For the illusive tomorrows
There will be no more pain
No more dying
No more striving or strain
No more pain"....."No More Pain" by Point of Grace

Rev 21:1-7 (NASB). "Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth; for the first heaven and the first earth passed away, and there is no longer any sea. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, made ready as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.”
And He who sits on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” And He *said, “Write, for these words are faithful and true.” Then He said to me, “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give to the one who thirsts from the spring of the water of life without cost. He who overcomes will inherit these things, and I will be his God and he will be My son"

Taking Whatever Breaks I Can Get....

You might be pathetic if....

You're grocery shopping, like REALLY grocery shopping.....not just running in for 1 thing....and it hits you that you're doing something NORMAL. And you slow down and start looking at all the things on the shelves, to see if you can discover something new. Because you've decided that for 30 whole minutes, you can pretend everything is normal and good....at least until her prescription's ready....

‪#‎iLikeTheLandOfMakeBelieve‬ ‪#‎CaniStayHereForaWhile‬

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Officer Friendlies

we interrupt the cancer posts for a police rant::

dang, y'all......my newsfeed is often so full of negativity against law enforcement, attys, judges, etc.....personal posts, articles shared....and I know there's a lot of corruption out there, and am not going to say I like our government in general.....BUT...

I'm thinking of 2 very nice, sympathetic & helpful officers who came at my call not very long ago, stepped in & saved the day for me and my kiddos, gave me advice after assessing the situation and getting it under control, told me what to do because I was too upset to think, & stayed with us until we were ok .....and of times I should have called someone and didn't. I'm thinking of 2 very good attorneys who have also come to my rescue when all other options had been exhausted and have performed their duties and jobs in nothing but the most ethical of ways. And of judges who help pass things through the legal system and stop the crazy for those who need help stopping the crazy!!!

These people who are so criticized spend their lives rescuing people from themselves and coming to the aid of people who are targets of those who don't know how to behave with even basic human decency. They deal with crazy, maddening, and heartbreaking situations.....they spend long hours away from those they love to protect and serve us, and I'd like to think for every corrupt instance that makes the news, there's COUNTLESS good instances that never do and go unnoticed.

SO, for the officers that were my heroes for the day & whom I will never forget, for the attys that have come to my aid, and for the judges who process crazy through a constantly rotating door.....here's a positive post and a THANK YOU.

And, I'll throw firefighters in there, too. Cuz while I've never had one come to my aid, they put their lives on the line as well. And they're just COOL. And............I really like their big, red trucks. wink emoticon

‪#‎SteppingOffMySoapboxNow‬

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

First Day at Proton

....she feels yucky today....and is **anxious** about going to radiation. cry emoticon </3

And she gets mad at me for stroking her head and giving her a kiss on the cheek when I walk by her.

Get over it, girlfriend....yo mama's never gonna change. wink emoticon heart emoticon

‪#‎PrayForAshlyn‬

*********************************************************
The receptionist just looked at me and my 3 kids....looked at each one of them.....and asked which one is Ashlyn.

‪#‎BitingMyTongue‬

Smile. Be nice....maybe she's had a long day. Bless her heart.

***************************************************************************

She just went back for her first radiation treatment....after meeting with her dr. & again being reminded of how harsh her treatment is & of the side effects. And she was already wound tighter than tight with anxiety....

When I listed all the possible side effects, I purposely didn't include the %ages of likelihood for each. Some are much greater than others, some have small %ages....but quite frankly, when your daughter has been diagnosed with a cancer that she had less than a 7% chance of getting in the first place....you find ZERO comfort in %ages.

The only comfort I find is in knowing she's got literally a legion of prayer warriors covering her in prayer. You really don't know how much I'm relying on those prayers, or how often I pull up my posts & read each comment & scroll through each list of "likes"......& thank God for each one of you that keep "liking" & commenting, day after day....post after post.

In Christ our Hope is found, in Him our fears are calmed....and in prayer, you're getting us through. heart emoticon

Lord, show us your Glory.

‪#‎PrayForAshlyn‬

Monday, October 6, 2014

When You Get a Break from the Hospital...

Never undervalue the feelings of having everything unpacked, laundered & put away (again), everyone being under one roof..... having fresh, clean hair & skin that has had the hospital smell washed away and replaced with a scent that's much more "you"....and the comfort & bliss of your very own bed!! Ahhhhh....

‪#‎ThingsImThankfulFor‬

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Friday, October 3, 2014

Having a Mom Moment

She's sitting over there in her hospital bed....MAD & sad, reading her book & listening to her music with her earbuds in....and she's SO STINKIN' CUTE. I want her to be little again so I can cover her in kisses, smother her with hugs, hold her for a really long time, rock her in a rocking chair, sing her a song....and make her whole word perfect again....and watch her hop down from my lap & go grab a toy & play....cuz whatever had rocked her little word was gone & forgotten. Mommy had fixed it like Mommy always does.

‪#‎KeepScrolling‬
‪#‎JustHavingaMomMoment‬

Only By The Grace of God

Looking through my calendar for a needed telephone #, because it has become my notepad, too, at times..... from January on....it's a MESS!!! Holy Cow. I went through/did ALL of that....and am still functioning?!?! And that's just a portion.....I need a nap from just looking at it!!!

‪#‎OnlyByTheGraceOfGod‬‪#‎GodIsGoodAllTheTimeAndAllTheTimeGodIsGood‬‪#‎Thankful‬